Crazy shit that happens when you travel

When I think of some of the crazy stuff that has happened to me during my travels, some of it seems almost unbelievable! So much happens every day when you travel, that some things that might seem surreal if they happened to you at home, are all completely possible and part of the everyday experience when you are on the road! It can be something that was funny at the time, or not funny until looooong after! Either way, it’s these sort of memories that keep many of us travelling, so I thought it would be entertaining for you to share some of mine..

Surviving a cyclone!

Many of my craziest travel stories stem from the 3 weeks I spent working in the Australian Outback town of Newman. About a week after I had arrived, we were told there was a cyclone that had just hit nearby Port Headland (around 4 hours drive north) that was coming straight towards us. Coming from a country that doesn’t get major cyclones, this was enough to scare me a little bit. There was also the fact that all the pub staff (including me) were living in a little caravans (which were provided as free accommodation for all staff). I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a small caravan in a cyclone, but the best way I can describe it is like a tin can in a huge gust of wind! Fortunately, we were able to shelter in the pub (which was thankfully a large brick building), but seeing what is effectively a whole trailer park be blown to bits was quite something! Especially seeing as anyone who wasn’t pub staff was not allowed to shelter in the pub (which I thought was a little unfair!) There were people who had to just stick it out in their caravan, and just hope they, and all of their belongings would not be blown away!

The girl who shat in the hostel common room

Whilst staying in Budapest recently, I got up one morning to hear the hostel reception staff talking. I’d become good friends with them during my stay, so after hearing the words “and then I turned round to find she’d shat on the floor”, I couldn’t resist asking what the gossip was. As it turns out, there was a group of girls at the hostel staying together who had got really drunk. One of them was much more drunk than the others, so they left her sitting/sleeping in the lounge while they headed out. Anyway, the girl started projectile vomiting pretty hard, and the person working on hostel reception that night was forced to clean it up and pretty much carry the drunk girl to her bed. It was upon returning downstairs however, that she (person working on reception) discovered there was poo lying on the floor right next to where this girl was sitting! She turned round and there was also some lying on the chair. Now I’m not talking about a little bit of poo here, I’m talking like full on diarrhoea! The girl working on reception that night was forced to clean it up as the girl who had done it was in bed and incapable of walking! The chair eventually got thrown out as it was quite hard to get the stain out, and the group of girls checked out first thing the following morning after hearing what had happened! Although I wasn’t present at the time, this was definitely the funniest story I’ve heard while travelling ever!

That girl who tried to cook salmon in a coffee machine

In that same Budapest hostel (I swear it was actually a really good hostel, just had a few weird people lol) there was another girl, who this time I did get to meet. She was by far the craziest person I’ve met in a hostel ever. The icing on the cake being when we walked into the kitchen to find her trying to cook raw salmon in a coffee machine! At first we thought maybe she was just having a few communication problems because she was from Korea and didn’t speak a lot of English, but after speaking with another Korean guy staying at the hostel he confirmed to us that she was indeed just a bit of a nut! There was a lot of other stuff that was crazy about that girl, but by far the most bizarre was seeing someone stuff salmon into a coffee machine! The strange people you meet in hostels sometimes…

Working in a drive through liquor store

I don’t know if it’s just me who finds this stupid (because they don’t exist in my home country), but the existence of a drive through liquor store just seems like it’s bound to cause trouble! Whilst out in Australia’s outback, I had to cover shifts at one every now and again, and people would literally drive up in their trucks, open the door (beer cans would literally fall out), and then purchase alcohol, before driving off. It seemed pretty normal to everyone there, and I suppose it’s like how they sell booze in some petrol (gas) stations back home, but to me it just seemed the most crazy thing for people to be able to rock up like it’s McDonald’s, and drive away with some booze in hand, usually drinking it as they went!

Working for a hells angle!

I’ve already mentioned a few stories from my short venture into Australia’s Outback. Well by far the worst was having to work for possibly the craziest boss I’ve ever met in the world. To give you an idea of what this guy like, he was around 6 ft 5, built like a tank, and dressed exactly like a Hells Angle. To top it off he had his nick-name “Pidge” tattooed across the back of his shaved skin-head. Sometimes looks can be deceiving, but when I rocked up into Newman to start my new job, and was greeted by this guy, the feeling of “Oh shit” did come to mind! Anyway, turns out he lived up to the stereotype, was a racist, constantly had fights with the local aborigines, and training consisted of him shouting at all staff members at the top of his voice! Had it not been ridiculously high paying I wouldn’t even have stayed the 3 weeks that I did, although I was supposed to stay a minimum of 6.

Eating out of pots & pans, and stealing cutlery from the pub!

In all my life I had never stolen anything. Most people have lifted sweeties from a shop as kids, but I had never even done that! So when my friend and I had finished cooking dinner in our Brisbane hostel, only to find that we had no plates, bowls, cups, or cutlery, we were in a bit of predicament! Somebody somewhere had some plastic cups that I remember using, and we decided that we could just eat the food out of the pot and pan we used to cook it, but seeing as it was a rice based dish, cutlery was something we would still really need! The pub downstairs served food, so I figured the best thing to do was just swipe some for both of us. I went down to grab the cutlery. I picked it up, and walked out casually as if nothing had happened. All in all that’s not a very exciting story, but the stupid this was I didn’t go back into that pub for the rest of the time I was in Brisbane in case they suddenly discovered I’d taken two sets of cutlery lol. Crime of the century! 😛

Getting trapped by a poisonous spider

The first 5 months I spent travelling Australia, I had never seen one spider. Back home we had always been of the impression that spiders would be part of everyday life in Australia, but I never saw any. That was until I went out into the Outback! Whilst in the little self service laundrette room across the road from my accommodation, I turned round to walk out of the glass paneled door behind me, only to see a huuuuuuuge spider hanging down just outside the door. There was only one way out, and that spider was in front of it! Having no prior experience of poisonous spiders in Australia beforehand, I had no idea whether this spider was one that could be dangerous or not, however by looking at the sheer size of it, I wasn’t going to take any chances! I had a few hours to wait on my washing. I had no phone with me, and there was no one else around, so I decided just to wait inside on my clothes getting washed and dried, by which point I had hoped the spider would go away. Unfortunately, it hadn’t, and it was getting really dark outside. There was no one else around, and I had to make a choice. Stay here all night, or just run out the door and hope it doesn’t land on me. I choose the latter. Thankfully, as I swung the door open it hit the spider on it’s web, and flung it off into the distance. I then immediately ran across the road to my accommodation, closed the door, and spent the rest of the night constantly looking over my back paranoid there would be a spider on my back!

Secret free pizza!

This is my proudest moment ever as a backpacker, and that was my devious plan to get free Domino’s Pizza in Perth, Australia! Basically, I set up a deal with the staff in Domino’s, that if I brought at least 3 people with me who purchased pizzas, then I would get one full pizza free, with any basic topping. In our hostel all you had to do was say “anyone up for a pizza?” most days and at least a few people would say yes. All it would take would be to convince the 3rd person, and way hey I’ve bagged myself a free dinner! The deal was however, that I couldn’t tell anyone else in the hostel, but I think enough time has elapsed for me to tell my secret! 🙂

Having to make a cheeseburger last 3 days!

Definitely the worst of my travel stories, more so because of the consequences of it, rather than the actual event. To cut a long story short, I had my handbag nicked whilst in Amsterdam last year. Usually I keep back up documents and money back at the hostel, but for some reason on this I didn’t do that on that day. I have no idea why. Previously that day I had went into McDonald’s to use the free wifi internet on my laptop. I don’t usually eat McDonald’s food, but on that day I was short for time so I decided I would buy a happy meal + McFlurry. I ate the ice cream and fries, but by the time I got to the cheeseburger I was all full up, so decided to take it home for dinner instead. When my handbag got stolen however, all my ID, bank/credit cards, and money were taken. I literally didn’t even have 1 cent. I couldn’t get money sent over from the Western Union until I had a replacement passport, which I wouldn’t have been able to get until after the weekend as the consulate was closed. My only option was to try cut up this cheeseburger, and ration it over the weekend! By Sunday it was actually disgusting, but it was either that or don’t eat, as the hostel I was staying at didn’t do free (or any) breakfast. The ironic thing is that when I got to the consulate, they needed 127 Euros for an emergency passport… which I didn’t have! I then had to chance my luck at customs with nothing but a police report (I came through the Channel Tunnel on Eurolines), which they thankfully accepted! Although I think the fact that I was returning to my home country as opposed to somewhere else was the only reason why they let me through.

The day a police riot squad saved me from getting beat up!

I was in Berlin recently, and woke up one morning to find there was over 100 police vans parked along the main road beside my hostel in Berlin’s East Side. Apparently, there had been protests and demonstrations since the early hours from nearby squatters, protesting at being evicted by the police. The protests had ended by the time I went out, so as I made my way along to the East Side Gallery, which I had been planning to visit that day, I began to get a little confused by the 5 riot police marching steadily towards me. I looked behind me, thinking they must be heading for someone else, but could see no-one. There were a few local people up ahead who didn’t seem to be taking much notice, so I continued on thinking they must just be patrolling the area due to the protests held earlier on in the day. As they got steadily closer however, I did start to worry a bit. Why do they keep looking right at me? Just as I was pondering my thoughts, out of nowhere jumped a guy in plain clothes from behind the car I was just passing. He had what looked like a police baton (but was clearly not a police officer), yelled something in German, and then went to strike down his baton on my head. With no time to react I covered my head with my arms, crouched down a little, and without realising I had closed my eyes too. About 30 seconds later, having not been hit, I opened my eyes to see what was going on around me. The 6 police officers in riot gear had caught him just in time, and brought him to the ground right beside me. As I looked around another two officers had appeared behind me, and in hindsight I’m guessing he was aiming for them, not me, but I suppose I’ll never know! Either way, I just about pooped my pants! 🙂

The party on the roof of my hostel that had 2 policemen raid our rooms!

While in Dusseldorf around 3 years ago, I was partying with a bunch of Russian students in our hostel when we all decided to go up onto the roof. It was one of those hostels which closes reception between 9pm – 6am, so is effectively unmanned during party hours! I vaguely remember someone shouting “hey!” from down below, but didn’t really think anything of it. Around 10 minutes later I headed down with around 6 of the Russians to chat to them while they smoked. It was at this point that 2 police men turned up wanting to know our names, addresses, and see our ID, after which they proceeded to enter the hostel and go into every single dorm room, waking people up. They(the policemen) seemed really angry, especially when they found out there was no-one they could speak to at reception, when two of the prettier Russian girls looked at each other, nodded, and then went up and started flirting with the two police officers. Immediately, the attitude of the policemen changed, and they spent 10 minutes chatting, swapped numbers, and then left us to continue out partying into the night. Usually I wouldn’t feel comfortable with girls clearly using their sexuality to gain from a situation, but they may just have saved us all from getting arrested so who am I to complain? 😉

– I have so many stories to share from my travels that it would just be too long a post to share them all on here today. I will one day share some more with you, although I am sure you will understand when I say some will stay hidden forever! Anyone who’s been backpacking before knows exactly why!

13 Responses to “Crazy shit that happens when you travel”

  1. Okay, the girl and the poo story is just horrible. The joys of working in a hostel, huh?

  2. T Roach says:

    I like your stories! The fish in the coffee machine is a remarkable idea…I wonder why she would consider doing that.

  3. Oliver says:

    nice pic , it really made me smile 🙂

  4. The salmon story seems doable if you put some sort of wire rack in the steamer part… could be the next craze to hit to the world. 2 in 1 coffee/salmon machine!

  5. My fave is definitely the poo one. How embarrassing. 🙂

  6. The girl who shat in the common room, hahah. Hilariously disturbing. 🙂

  7. Alouise says:

    Holy that is some crazy shit to happen on your travels. The common room story is so messed up, but funny. And the girl cooking salmon in the coffee pot is something I’ve never heard of. Although after my great grandmother had dementia she tried to cook eggs in the coffee pot.

  8. haha that is a great bunch of amazing stories
    that poor drunk girl, and the hostel staff :p

  9. Dan Thompson says:

    Freaking hilarious. Thanks for sharing!

    Dan

  10. Knew a girl that pissed in a common room once, yours takes the cake, ewwww…. Sick pic.

  11. That spider story… man… Spiders freak me out, I would’ve waited inside too! This was a hilarious read though, thanks for sharing 😀

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  1. […] makes up for it rather nicely however with her post on the girl who “shat in the hostel common room”. A bit of scataphobia always goes down a treat […]

  2. […] you enjoyed this article you may also be interested in hearing more of my crazy stories from the road such as that time I worked for a crazy hells angle in the Australian outback, or that time a girl […]


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